Diary of the 6th Age

How did I miss that?

2008-08-18T01:51:54Z

Since the first time I saw it, The Princess Bride has been my favourite film. There are so many great lines, funny things and wonderful stories in there - and a surprising number of famous people.

Recently, a friend lent me season 1 of Dead Like Me (and some of you can probably already see where this is going). I loved it and went out of my way to see all of it that I could. I particularly liked the role played by Mandy Patinkin, and decided to seek out other things that he's been in, such as Criminal Minds (which I'm watching at the moment - I've just seen episode 3x01, and it looks like he might be leaving, but don't spoil it please).

So I thought I'd wiki him up and see what else he'd been in...

I knew that that there had been a Mandy in Princess Bride, playing a male role, but I didn't quite connect the dots - that it was the same Mandy, and that he played that particular role... How cool is that!

Now I need a while to get my head around it :-)

The hypocrisy of democracy

2008-08-13T23:42:06Z

I find myself thinking once again of the problems inherent in government. Humanity has found many many different ways for a few people to rule over the rest of us (for our own good) and none of them is really satisfactory.

Heinlein described democracy as (paraphrased) maybe not the best system of government that there is, but the best that we have. I may agree with the principle, but in practise it sucks badly, at least the way we're trying to enact it in this country (although if you wanted to be accurate, you'd describe the UK as a constitutional monarchy - the fact of the matter is that the monarch has not exercised veto power since 1708 and just rubber stamps whatever the houses of parliament come up with).

Originally, the House of Commons would create legislation and the House of Lords would be given the opportunity to block it, with the Lords acting as the ultimate authority in matters of law (they were the court of final appeal). This has changed somewhat with the passing of the parliament acts of 1911 and 1949, which prevent the House of Lords from completely blocking an act, instead permitting them only to delay it. The House of Lords was appointed, whereas the House of Commons was elected.

It seems that the government is determined to neuter what little power the Lords have left by making the House of Lords fully elected, although with longer terms than in the House of Commons. I think this is a very bad move, personally.

In an ideal world, the people we elect would go to the Houses of Parliament and would represent our views to influence policy and law making. Sadly, this simply does not happen. There are two reasons for this

The first past the post system can give horribly skewed results. For example, in the last general election, the Labour party got 35.3% of the total votes (hardly a massive vote of confidence) but this gained them 356 seats in the House of Commons (out of 646). 35.3% of the votes got them 55.1% of the seats, and complete power to pass any law they wanted. In contrast, the second place party (the Conservatives) had 32.3% of the votes, and 30.7% of the seats as a result. So a Labour vote was worth about 1.5 times as much as a Conservative vote.
The elected Members of Parliament do not represent the views of their constituents. Due to the party whips, the MPs are forced to vote for whatever their party thinks best, and the needs/wants of the constituents are the least of their considerations, except for when the party doesn't care how the vote turns out.

Those are the two biggest problems with the system as we use it in the UK. There are a few major flaws with any representative form of government that allows the people to vote for who will represent them. Namely:

Because the people doing the voting are (these days) aware of what's being voted for and done by our elected ministers, there's a constant drive to be seen to be doing what the people want. This can lead to very bad laws being promoted and passed as a kneejerk reaction. For example, after the Dunblane shooting, handguns were banned. Never mind that the shooter should never have been given a handgun license in the first place - something bad happened, it was big in the media so the politicians had to respond. I'm not saying that handguns should be allowed (or that they shouldn't - I can argue it either way, really) but I do think that any law that introduces such a big change to the way things work should be debated and gone over for some time, and not just introduced in a hurry because the media demands it.
The hard choices become impossible. No elected person will ever want to do anything that the public in general will not like (no matter how necessary) - and they will use as much spin and lies as they can to keep it from the public. Look at the Iraq War (and the dodgy dossier).
Bread and Circuses. The people who are not sure which party to vote for will go with whoever offers them the most - which means that a party offering to tax the rich (few) heavily in order to provide welfare and benefits for the poor (many) will get a lot of support from a lot of people. Never mind that such systems are inevitably unfair, and that they promote vastly complex systems that noone can understand, so that the government can make changes and then tell you that you're better off for it (the 10p tax rate, tax credits, etc). The tax system is beyond a joke, with exceptions for some things, allowances for others, credits for yet more if you meet the requirements. A simplified system would massively cut down on overhead, and thus cost less to run. But that would mean that people could understand, and that's not in the interests of the politicians...

Never mind the problem of people who can vote for the amount of their own pay rises and who have very little in the way of oversight regarding their job requirements, or the shocking amounts that they have been using for expenses...

All of that bothers me, but what bothers me most is that the politicians, and most noticeably the Prime Minister are ignoring the whole of the spirit of the rules. The point of the system is to give us a say in the way our country is run. When Blair was the leader of the Labour party, people voted for him because he was charismatic. As far as I can see, he didn't have much in the way of goals other than not screwing up the economy and not annoying America, but people liked him.

Now we have Brown, and I have some problems with him. It seemed when he first took over from Blair that he was going to call a General Election in order to have his Prime Minister-ship confirmed, but then he backed away when it looked as if he might lose any such election. Since then, Labour have been thrashed at the polls, at two by-elections and are generally not liked or trusted. The people do not want them in charge of anything, let alone the whole country. And they know it. So why don't they do the decent thing and call an election? The answer is simple, it would cost them power... And they can't have that...

So they cling to power and continue to pass law after law that we do not want, and that we have no say over whatsoever. Because some people liked the guy in charge three years ago, the yahoos at the top now can do anything they want, and they know it. If they had any decency they'd announce a general election asap.

I don't have solutions, I just know that the system is horribly flawed, and I don't like it.

the Visitation (Scion)

2008-07-23T12:58:47Z

plib has put up a visitation story for two of the NPCs in her Scion game, and so here is my character's story.

The situation: the three of them (Josef, Luke and Kathy) are in a car, headed to York. The journey is long, and Josef is asked to tell the story of his visitation.

Be warned, it's quite long...

______
Josef sits back, trying to get comfortable. His large frame doesn't seem to have been accounted for when the car seats were designed, but a few minutes of shifting and the sound of tortured springs stops as he settles, a slight smile on his face.

It was not that long ago, really... I was fairly new to England." Josef stops for a moment and looks to Kathy, then over to Luke before continuing. "I'd come here looking for something, and finally found it - if not quite in the way I had expected." Josef looks a little uncomfortable talking about this.

"So there I was, sitting in the cafe. I had planned to spend the day looking for work. I may not be that smart, but I can lift and carry, and I don't need much to live on." Josef shrugs, "I lived for two years with nothing more than the clothes on my back and what I could carry. So I was quite happily enjoying my omelette when a strange man sat beside me. I looked up at him, a little unhappily. There were plenty of other places to sit, why was he next to me?"

Josef smiles, "Normally when I look at someone with that look, they move pretty fast, but not this fellow. He was big - bigger even than me, and looked strong to match. As I took in his size, I was thinking to myself that I might have finally found someone who could challenge me at wrestling, and I must have smiled at him, for he smiled back. He waved a hand lazily at the man behind the counter and the staff rushed to work, bringing out a plate full of food for him quicker than seemed possible, and he tucked in with gusto. I decided to follow his lead, keeping half an eye on him while eating, enjoying my food. There was a sense of companionship about him, he didn't seem to be intruding any longer."

Josef pauses to take a drink, refastening the top on his bottle before going on. "We both finished at about the same time, and I sat back to let the food settle, enjoying the feeling of fullness. The strange man sat back beside me and then winked at me before speaking. 'I see you are a man who enjoys his food, Josef' he said. I was a little surprised that he knew my name. There were very few people who had any clue where I was, and I felt like I should be on my guard, but something seemed to be telling me that I could trust him. I asked how he knew my name and he explained that he'd been watching me. He said he had seen my long journey..." Josef again looks a little uncomfortable, grimacing slightly before going on, "I asked how he knew me, and he said that he was a god. He said it in a matter of fact tone of voice, just like you'd mention that it's raining outside. I must have looked at him a little curiously, not sure how to take it as he then reached over and touched me on the forehead, speaking softly, 'and I'm your father.'"

Josef looks out of the window, seeing a road sign. "That's how he visited me. But then, given how long we'll be stuck in this car, I suppose you'll want to know what happened next..."

"He told me that he had a problem and wanted my help. Now, I was already looking for work, but then this guy claimed to be a god, and my father, and wanted help? I was a little dubious, and told him so. I said that if he knew of my journey, then he knew that it had taken me 8 years to find her." Josef blushes a little, but refuses to elaborate on who "she" is, simply going on with the story. "I told him I would not leave - I might be needed. He just looked at me and nodded, taking out a small package and placing it on the table before gesturing to me. I opened it, and inside were a pair of gauntlets." Josef holds up his hands, showing his gauntlets to Kathy and Luke, "They looked just like these ones. He said that he could show me a way to keep watch over people in case they needed me from far away. I'll admit, by this point I was curious. I asked him to show me how they worked, and so he paid the bill and we left."

Josef lowers his hands again, "Now, I'd been feeling a little different since he touched my forehead. Something was awakening in me, growing and making me feel tougher, stronger. A part of me was starting to believe his story of being a god, and I wanted to know what this meant. He told me how to place a vigil brand on someone, and how to use it to ensure that they were safe. At which point I asked to know more of this job that he needed doing."

One of Josef's hands moves to the axe handle and softly strokes it as he goes on, "He told me that someone had unearthed a dangerous relic, an artifact of some Amatsu-Mikasomething-or-other. The artifact was causing problems, and he said that if it continued to be used, the problems would simply grow bigger. I still looked a little uncertain, but when he told me people's lives were at risk I knew that he was telling the truth, and that I had to help. He asked if I had a car and I smiled at him, saying that I was happy to walk to wherever the problem was. He seemed to think it was fairly urgent though, so gave me a wad of money and waved his hand. A taxi immediately stopped nearby and he bent down to talk to the driver, then stood back up and looked at me. He told me that the artifact was in the form of an axe, and that I should get it and bring it back, to him, here. I nodded and got into the taxi."

Josef's eyes drift down and he spots his fingers stroking the axe handle, abruptly pulling them away, as if burned. "We drove for some time and arrived outside a small town, near a large graveyard. The taxi driver looked at me and I checked my wallet. It was depressingly empty, so I took out the wad of notes the old man had given me. I felt a little bad about using what I thought was probably not real money. The old man had likely magicked it up from somewhere, and there was no telling when or if it would disappear again, but there was no way I could afford to pay from my own money. The driver's eyes lit up at the sight of so much money, so I smiled at him and handed over the whole wad. He was rather shocked, and obviously thought he was getting a good deal as he slammed the door behind me and drove off in a hurry, as if afraid that I'd change my mind. I felt better having the money out of my hands."

Josef lowers the car window a little and takes a deep breath of fresh air, smiling as he turns back to Kathy and Luke. "I moved on, into the graveyard. A little way inside there was a spade propped against the wall, so I took that with me and went on deeper. I could hear some kind of movement, lots and lots of people, from the sound of it. I followed the noise and as I got nearer I could hear a quiet wailing. It was an eery noise, it didn't sound at all right, or as if it belonged there. Eventually I rounded a corner and saw them. A crowd of bodies, mostly very obviously dead, some nothing more than skeletons in rags. They were all clustered around something, and it was from the middle of the mob I could hear the wailing. As I watched, I saw the circle expanding slowly, hands being thrust through the earth as the undead pulled themselves from their graves and into the air. I strode forward and was a little surprised when some of them noticed me and turned to face me. The shovel was a reassuring weight in my hands, but I knew I couldn't face such numbers if they all attacked at once."

Josef spots a sign out of the window, pointing, "Services soon. I'd appreciate a break." He sits quietly for a few minutes then grins, "oh, where was I? The zombies... they slowly all turned to face me, moving outwards until I could see what was at the centre of the circle. There was a man there, but his face was twisted and wracked with agony. He was clutching an axe to his chest and letting out a low wail. I saw the runes grow brighter and his wails grew louder, as if the very life was being sucked from him, and another zombie started to thrust it's way from the ground. I started forward, determined to stop this. The man was obviously in agony, and the souls of the dead being defiled. Someone had to stop it. As soon as I started to get near, the zombies turned to me, advancing menacingly. I didn't want to further desecrate the bodies of the dead so I tried to fight back without 'hurting' them. It was harder than it may sound, although I did notice that my muscles moved much more easily, and I seemed posessed of a strength far greater than before. I was slowly driven back and as I was I heard a voice not far away, calling out, 'what's that noise? Do we have an intruder?' Then a woman stepped into view."

"I knew right away that she was no ordinary woman. Her skin was as pale as alabaster, and her hair and nails jet black. She seemed to exude a darkness which moved with her, and made the world seem somewhat duller around her. She wore but a single piece of Jewellery, a necklace with a stylised red sun surrounded by red rays leading outwards. She turned to face me and waved a hand and the zombies backed away. She began to walk nearer and I clutched the shovel a little tighter. 'What do we have here then? A godling, come to test his mettle? You cannot stand before the might of Amatsu-Mikaboshi!' She held forth her amulet and a bolt of darkness flew from it, straight towards me. I instinctively raised my arms to shield myself and the bolt of energy ricocheted from the gauntlets, striking a nearby tree which immediately turned black and lifeless. I'm not sure which of us was the most surprised. She launched another bolt, and then another, but I was able to parry them with the gauntlets. I decided to capitalise on her uneasiness and strode forwards, towards her. 'I'm here to stop this travesty,' I said in a deep voice, as she slowly backed away. Then she turned to me and smiled, 'Then go ahead, strike me down. Your... weapons cannot harm me.' She didn't seem all that impressed by my shovel, but I stepped up to face her and feinted at her with it. She easily blocked it with her arm, and I swear the shovel head was dented by the impact. I tried to dummy an attack with the shovel on one side, then swinging my fist at her, hoping the gauntlets would do some damage, but they just bounced from her skin, not seeming to have any impact."

"The zombies had continued to back off since her last command, and they were now a little more spaced out, so I decided on a different tactic. I turned and charged at the nearest zombie, as fast as I could. I hit it hard, my momentum pushing me into it and lifting it from the ground, carrying it along and into the next, then the next. I had aimed a little off-centre and found myself brought to a halt just past the strange man at the centre of the mob. The zombies were waiting for instructions and didn't seem to know what to do with me, so I turned to the man and kneeled, ignoring the zombies for the moment. I could hear the woman shouting, ranting about how the axe would do her bidding whoever was wielding it, and that no petty godling was going to stop her. The man looked to be in agony, but he just clutched the axe tighter to his chest when I touched it. I looked him in the eye and promised that I could end this, if he'd give me the axe. After a moment, he nodded and let go of the axe slowly. I could see how hard it was for him to do, and couldn't help but admire him - that he still had the strength of will after what he'd been through."

Josef takes another drink, thinking for a moment, "I took the axe and stood, starting to move back through the zombies, who were now stepping backwards. I touched it to one and willed him to be freed and he collapsed, the animating force drawn back into the axe. I moved forward, touching the zombies around me one by one, releasing them from their undead state. The woman saw me with the axe and laughed, a low, evil laugh. 'You cannot control it... Only the chosen of Amatsu-Mikaboshi can control it...' She seemed a little bit insane, but then she gestured and the axe turned in my hands, driving towards my throat. I had cause to be thankful once again for my newly found strength, as I was able to wrestle the axe to a standstill. I stood there, the axe straining against me, trying to bury itself in my throat. All of my concentration was on holding the axe in place, for I knew that if it were free to move, i would be dead, and likely the next zombie."

"As I fought the axe, she walked over, slowly moving to me and walking around me, looking closely, as if examining a specimen or an animal at the zoo. 'My, you're a strong one. You might even make a good wielder... this poor fellow was only good for another few and then he would have been drained, but I could use your life to make hundreds, thousands of them...' She walked around behind me and I saw my chance. I released the axe, dropping to my knees as it flew for where my throat had been, grazing the top of my head then passing on and striking the woman in the neck. As soon as she was struck, the pressure seemed to leave the axe, and she collapsed to the floor, bright black blood pouring from her wound. 'Fool... What have you done?' she gasped out before collapsing over the axe. Her eyes closed and she seemed to become a little translucent, the light passing through her as her body faded away. The blood was another matter. It seemed to be slowly sucked into the axe, a disturbing thing to see."

"And that was that. I put the rest of the undead to rest and then helped the poor man to recover. He was the local gravedigger and was approached by the strange woman - or whatever she was - and asked to place the axe in one of the tombs. As soon as he took it up he felt a strange rage come over him and she was able to control him, and it seemed that she was using his life to raise the undead. I stayed around for a few days, helping him to re-bury the dead, and then set off for home. That journey took another week or so, as I took my time, not rushing, but enjoying the spring air. Eventually I got back to the cafe and handed over the axe. The man was there and he thanked me for my help, asked for his gauntlets back and smiled. I gave him the gauntlets and he put them on, then took out another pair for me, which looked identical. He then handed me the axe, saying that it was dangerous, that it needed to be kept from the mortals, and was best out of the overrealm in the current troubled times, so he wanted me to look after it. I agreed to keep it safe for him and we spoke. He told me who he was, and generally what was going on. Some time later, Odin paid a visit to teach me a little about the dead, and how to see them, so that I could at least know if the axe were causing problems."

"I found a labouring job and got on with my life, for all of about two weeks, before he called me up again - and that led to here..."

Just what is the government for anyway? part 1

2008-05-06T13:30:47Z

Why do we have a government? They pass laws on a whole bunch of different things, having very far reaching consequences. What are they trying to accomplish with all this lawmaking - or rather, what should they be trying to accomplish?

Well - they are there to ensure that we are protected from foreign invasions... But if that were all, they could simply meet once per year to approve the budget and set the tax levels for the rest of the year. They obviously do more than this.

They control government spending - but to what end? The also set the taxes that we all have to pay in order to fund the spending. So what do they use to guide them in this?

Ultimately, I think it comes down to the fact that they represent the people - through democratic (ish) elections, they are chosen by us and work for us.

So by rights, they should always have as their goal the betterment of life for us, the people. Of course, any such betterment is pointless if it's not sustainable. Thus, any law which makes things better for the people in a sustainable fashion (i.e. not drawing unwisely from limited resources or taking things away from others) is a good law.

Additionally, we need someone or something that can oversee affairs on a national level - putting the needs of the country ahead of the individual needs of the people within. There may come a time when certain changes need to be made for the good of the country as a whole that cause things to become worse for certain individuals. This would include legislation to deal with crime.

Obviously a law prohibiting murder is going to restrict the freedom of a murderer, but in a way that we can clearly see is to the advantage of the vast majority of people within the country. We need to be very careful with this sort of legislation - there is no sense criminalising things just for the sake of it. We should look carefully at why something is considered criminal, and the social balance of doing so. In the case of a murderer, we have the case where it is legal to murder (several people dead) against where it is illegal to murder (one person with freedom restricted). In this case, the least deleterious effect is in the case where it is illegal to commit murder.

Consider the effect of criminalising the purchase of bread. If bread remains legal, nothing bad happens. If bread is criminalised, we either have many people committing illegal acts every day or we have a number of businesses losing out on trade or going bust. Clearly the least bad solution is to not criminalise the purchase of bread.

So a good law is either wholly positive: one that provides good things for at least some of the people while providing bad things for none of them;
or limiting and negative: one that acts to limit the bad things that can happen to people (e.g. criminalising murder. We are still restricting the freedom of the murderer, but doing so to prevent the murder of others).

Dr Who

2008-04-17T12:39:38Z

So, we're two episodes into the new season of Dr Who. I didn't want to comment after the first episode, largely because everyone I spoke to loved it, but it didn't sit right with me. I figured I'd wait for another episode and see how I felt then.

My issues with the first episode were twofold. Firstly, the Doctor let the aliens get away with their crime. The person directly responsible was killed, sure, but the aliens in the big space ships got exactly what they wanted (if perhaps not as much of it as they wanted) with no negative consequences. The little critters may well be innocent and all, but their parents certainly weren't. I get that they wanted to paint the Doctor as being kind and forebearing, not wanting to harm the little fellows - after all, they are kinda innocent in the matter. But that doesn't mean that you can't punish the parents another way...

The second problem was Donna. She came across as way way too needy, at least at the beginning. I am pleased to say that as of episode two, she seemed to be getting a lot better (standing up to the Doctor and arguing with him without fear of being left behind) but in the first one, she was a bit too desperate to find him. This of course leads to all sorts of speculation that she might be a spy, or working for someone wanting to get at the Doctor - and we're going to have to wait and see.

(Incidentally, the bad woman said that she'd gone a long way to find a place as overweight as the UK. Strange, given that she'd covered intergalactic distances, and missed the place just across the pond... http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/hea_obe-health-obesity )

The second episode was somewhat better. The bad guys had reasons for what they were doing, even if we didn't see all that we wanted to of them. The business with the explosion being big enough to push a hole through time itself, leading to accurate prophecy seemed a bit of a stretch to me though (particularly as the story was saying that without intervention there would be no explosion). Why then were all of the prophets turning to stone? It was said that they had aliens riding in them, but that seemed rather unnecessary for the story - the aliens only controlled a very few people. To be honest, I wasn't paying as much attention to it as I could have been, so may have missed finer details.

I was a little put out at the Doctor's reluctance to make the mountain go boom. After he said earlier in the episode that some things were necessary and unstoppable, and it was established that if they didn't blow it all up then the aliens would take over the whole planet - surely at that point it's a no-brainer. Ok, a few thousand people die - but they were already dead. I can't imagine how one can time travel without that fundamental understanding that everyone here is nothing more than a footnote in history at some point in the future, and that while efforts to make their lives better are surely a good thing, some of them have to die...

Nonetheless, all told, it's not bad so far. The two things that will really make my mind up about this season will be the Moffat episodes (8 and 9 I think) and the season finale. Moffatt always writes the best episodes, which is the high point of the season for me. On the other side, the finale always has a big build up and then ends with a handwave, using a Deus Ex Machina. This is not good tv - the Doctor should win through superior knowledge, cleverness, guile, trickery... Something that he himself did, at least. Not just the fact that he keeps ultimate cosmic power in the engine of his TARDIS (and that being the case, how the hell did the Time Lords get beaten in the first place?)

Of course, the second season of Torchwood did manage to end without a Deus Ex Machina, so I'm cautiously optimistic...

I would like to point out, incidentally, that I dislike the hints that RTD tends to use towards the season finale. In season 1, we had "Bad Wolf" in every episode. Season 2 had "Torchwood", and Season 3 was full of references to "Mr Saxon". These references give the more rabid fans something to talk about, but do nothing for most of us (and given some of the things the more rabid folks come up with, they don't help them a great deal). I'd prefer proper hints, that might actually give us a chance to work out what was coming... (because Bad Wolf really gave no clue towards Daleks running reality TV, and Rose becoming a Goddess to beat them. Likewise, Torchwood really indicated nothing more than the setting for the big Dalek vs Cybermen fight. The Mr Saxon references were a little better, as they indicated he was running for prime minister - and a lot of people speculated that he would be The Master - but it was still a bit of a leap).

a quickie

2008-04-06T00:37:07Z

A great man named Tacitus (ad 55? - 130?) once said:
"The more corrupt the state, the more numerous the laws. "

Consider then, this article from 2007: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/06/04/nlaws04.xml

Politics

2008-02-25T21:37:38Z

Not quite what I was planning to post, but it works, and I'm too tired/lazy to write anything else right now...

When it comes to politics, everyone seems to believe in different things. They all have labels (democrat, republican, labour, conservative, liberal, etc) and none of the labels really mean a lot to me - it seems to be that anyone who wants to be in government believes in Government more than any political ideal. The "democratic" system that we have in place in this country means that the apparatus of government gets bigger and bigger without any checks or balances. No party will ever reduce the number of civil servants, because that would mean job losses - and bad PR, and bad PR means they won't get elected again. Never mind what's good for the country, they're more concerned about what's good for them...

So rather than just complain, I thought I'd take a moment to go over what I believe.

I consider myself a Rational Anarchist.

The term Rational Anarchist is one I first encountered in the book, "The Moon is a Harsh Mistress" by Robert A Heinlein. The way it was described sounded exactly as I lived - or at least exactly as I wanted to live.

"A rational anarchist believes that concepts such as ‘state' and ‘society' and ‘government' have no existence such as physically exemplified in the acts of self-responsibility individuals. He believes that it is impossible to shift blame, share blame, distribute blame ... as blame, guilt, responsibility are matters taking place inside human beings singly and nowhere else. But being rational, he knows that not all individuals hold his evaluations, so he tries to live perfectly in an imperfect world ... aware that his effort will be less than perfect yet undismayed by self-knowledge of self-failure."

and

"But I will accept any rules that you feel necessary to your freedom. I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them to obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do."

Sum it up rather well. Basically, I acknowledge that certain rules are necessary for society to function, but that even then there is a certain amount of wiggle-room. Essentially, no system of law can adequately account for every possible scenario, and ours hardly even tries. So I will obey those laws that I agree with, disregard those that do not affect me and actively break those that I object to, so long as I can do so. I recognise that any penalties associated with breaking the law are my own responsibility, so simply weigh up the benefits gained from disregarding the law against the penalties I may face, and the likelihood of facing them.

In today's society with CCTV cameras everywhere and the government able to have us watched and followed as much as they like, it seems there is more likelihood of getting caught out than ever, but still I try. My main complaint with the current government is that they seem to believe socialism is the cure for all ills. That the state can spend our money better than we can, so they take more and more of it, using it for things that we never get to vote on, or object to. They massively overcomplicate things like the tax system, and it seems that the only reason is so that they can point at the bits that make them look good while sweeping under the rug the bits that make them look bad.

I think we would be better served by a minimalist government. One that provides defense, basic law and that's about it. People talk about the NHS being wonderful, but the cost to the consumer is an average of £1,500 per year for every man, woman and child in the country. I'd guess you could get significantly better treatment on private for that much money, but the NHS - like all government run projects - doesn't need to worry about budgets, timescales and the like, because if they run over nothing bad will happen. If they run out of money, they can take more from the taxpayer (look at the Dome, the Olympics, the Scottish Parliament building, the NHS computer system - all ran massively over budget). If the services were provided privately that would not be an option - the company would have to run more efficiently or go bust.

As well as all that, I find it irritating that the do-gooders in whitehall think they know much better than the rest of us. They act in a lot of cases as if they believe the general public to be too stupid to manage their own money. Once upon a time, the MPs were servants of the people, but now they've convinced themselves that they are our masters, and we let them do it.

If things keep on as they are, I'll be leaving the country. I'll probably end up going to America, as I know people there and the company I work for has offices there. I know it's just as bad, but at least I won't feel that as a voting member of the public, I'm partly to blame...

edit: Source for the £1,500 figure is here.
I can't find any data for figures after 2004, but as that shows, the amount spent in 2004 was in excess of £96 billion (with a population of around 60 million. Rather worryingly, this article here from the BBC states that the budget for 2002/2003 was £65 billion, where the PDF from the government statistics website states that expensiture was a good deal more than that. Are they going even further into debt? I'd not be surprised...

edit the second: this article from the Guardian in 2005 seems to indicate that comprehensive BUPA cover can be had for about £1,662 (look down the list for Private medical insurance). This would mean no queues, no waiting lists, just everyone being seen asap and getting what they need. Whereas £1,584 per year on the NHS gets us what? What are they wasting the money on?

Update

2008-02-17T01:20:22Z

Lots of changes since I last properly posted...

I moved out shortly after that last post, and now live in a place within 20 minutes walk of work, with working heating and hot water. There's not a great deal of room, and the kitchen and bathroom are shared, but I have plenty of room in my living room for tv, playstation, computer and laptop, so I'm comfortable. I do need more space for books, though - I buy way too many...

Work is going well. I've just had my annual review, and that went well, although we need to wait until March to find out how much of a difference it will actually make to our pay. The job is getting more demanding, but is still fun, and I am learning an awful lot about how DB pensions work, to the extent that other people on the team now come to ask me for information on some subjects, which is nice. There is a lot of work to do right now (I left work at 9pm on Monday and will have to go in tomorrow - Sunday - for a few hours :S) but hopefully that won't be the case forever...

I'm working on a few different qualifications through work (the company pays, and at the very least it'll be something nice to put on the CV). One of these is a diploma, which I could finish in June if I try. I have to do two more exams (both in May) and complete a report. The report is only small (3000 words or so) but it has me a lot more worried than the exams, not least because I doubt I can fit all the information into a report that small, and handing something that's too big in will result in an automatic fail. I've not yet decided if I'm going to do the report yet, but if I do, it will have to be done before June. If I miss that deadline, I can do it after the exams, and have it finished for December - which might be easier, but finishing it in June successfully would mean having completed the diploma within two years of starting in Pensions, which has to be a good thing.

Outside of work, I seem to have gotten awfully busy all of a sudden. I now roleplay every Tuesday at a pub in Purley and one weekend a month is given over to the BWoGs. For the last few weeks, I've been busy at least another day each week, often two. It may not sound like a lot, but for a social recluse like me it feels like I'm very busy.

Still single, and not sure what to do about it. I'd love to find someone to share time/fun/life with, but fear I am now well and truly fixed in my ways. I need my own space, and that was painfully obvious to me when living with friends. I really am socially unable to interact with people past a certain point, and while I'm getting better at clarifying where that point is, I still don't know how to fix it. As far as talking to strangers? It's easy if I have no interest in them, or if it's necessary for work. Making small talk with someone I might actually be attracted to? Impossible. And that's without the difficulty of finding people in the first place. I'm not a pub/club person, and have very few avenues to meet folks. I'd like to think it will all sort itself out, but am starting to fear I may be beyond that. For some reason, it's not so bad a thought as it could be...

So that's the update. Life is generally good. I am planning to write more here as and when I get time, but it's not something I can ever be any good at. One thing I do plan to do here is rant. I've got a list of topics, and plan to write down my thoughts on them, posting one each weekend. The first is written, but I want to go over it and tidy it up, maybe expand on it a little, so that will be posted next weekend, and I'll try to stay at least one ahead so that if I have a bad week I can still post.

I'm Willow? I guess I can see that... But Boomer?

2008-02-04T23:23:47Z

Which Buffy the Vampire Slayer Character Are You?

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Which Battlestar Galactica Character Are You?

Created by BuddyTV

Life

2007-03-26T20:51:19Z

So I've been thinking lately that I really need to write something to go here...

No idea what though.

I thought to myself - well, I'm exactly where I was when I last posted - nothing has changed. But then I thought about it...

The immediate stuff: I just had a tikka masala. It was a little hotter than I was expecting, so my mouth is burning a bit, and I'm drinking lots of diet coke. It was very nice though. We currently have no heating here and no hot water, so I'm a little cold (I'll get my sleeping bag shortly and get cosy). I spoke to the landlady today about it - she has spoken to a plumber, she's just not sure when he'll be able to come over and fix it. I hope it's soon - I'm planning to move out soon, but I'd like to be able to at least shower sometime before then (baths take many many kettles full of hot water - I like them hot...)

Medium term: I've looked at one place so far, and have plans to look at two more tomorrow. The one I have seen looked very nice, although a touch smaller than I'd like ideally - I have a lot of stuff. Still it might be a good excuse to get rid of some of it. My ex is currently not speaking to me (yeah - singular - I've only really had one big relationship). This is unusual - normally we get on fairly well, even if we don't talk much these days - it's more because we just don't move in the same circles.

Long term: I've made a new friend. Always a good thing :-)

Discrimination, Morality and the Fate of Mankind

2007-02-08T14:48:45Z

An ambitious title, I'll admit.

There is a story here which details the plight of a blind systems manager who applied to and studied for a Project Management Professional (PMP) qualification, which is a highly recognised and worthwhile qualification managed by the Project Management Institute (PMI).

Being blind, she naturally had some trouble with this. The guide book for the qualification was presumably not available in braile (or not wanted). Not a problem, the PMI sent her a PDF of the book, which her screen-reading software (JAWS) should have been able to read. Apparently not - she reports she was unable to open the file, so a Word version was sent (and bear in mind, this is a guide book which retails for $50 - I can't imagine the company wanted to release it in any form that could be copied, let alone Word, which can also be trivially edited). The Word version worked with JAWS, but she struggled to navigate within the file, so had to pay someone to help her by reading it out to her.

When it came to the exam itself, she was given further assistance. Normally the exam is a 4 hour multiple choice affair. Because she was blind, additional time was given as well as someone to help by reading the questions and taking notes for her. She asked for permission to use her own computer to take the exam and was refused, and then asked if the JAWS software could be loaded onto the exam system, which was also refused. In the end she finished the exam in 8 hours and passed.

So she sued the PMI for discrimination, claiming that they did not take sufficient notice of her disability and change circumstances accordingly.

From what I can see in this article they did everything they possibly could. The only thing they refused was to allow her to use her own computer or software to take the exam - and let's face it, there's no way they could. They don't know what's on her computer or in the software that she wants to install in their system without examining it thoroughly, and that's easier said than done.

The disturbing thing from my point of view is that she won the case.

According to tribunal chairman Richard Barrowclough. "What is lacking in that approach is any degree of flexibility, of being prepared to listen to the claimant's views and wishes, or to look into or consider alternatives, once a view had been taken."

How happy would Richard Barrowclough be if some institute he received an important qualification from allowed it's students to install software on their network, was subsequently hacked and as a result the value of the qualification was called into question? More to the point, why should the onus be on the company to make all these changes - if she needed that much help to do a multiple choice exam, perhaps she should not have been given the qualification.

Basically a woman who needed 8 hours to do a 4 hour exam, who has trouble navigating Word documents and can't even open PDF documents and who needs a reader/note-taker to help with important exams has been given this qualification in Project Management. I fail to see how she can efficiently manage a project that uses computers. We've established that she has trouble with text, how will she see pictures done on a screen? How much management can you really do it you can't see what's going on?

Now I know that last paragraph sounds very biased - but the simple fact is that some disabilities prevent you from doing certain things. A man with only one leg cannot compete efficiently in a race, unless you want to hobble all the healthy people who take part, or have the race organisers get him a little car - but how is that fair to the other runners? More and more often the law is telling us to pretend their's nothing wrong with disabled people - but we're just deceiving ourselves and them - we should instead accept that there are some things they cannot do, but there are still a lot of things they can do. It may not be fair, but life rarely is - and it certainly isn't fair in my opinion if other people or companies that try to help are instead penalised.

Websites are a similar matter. Currently UK law says that websites should be useable by the disabled. This means most personal websites are technically illegal, and a risk. It may sound harsh, but I think that rather than have the majority pander to the minority (the disabled) we should let the market work it out. If an online shop is not useable by the disabled, then they won't shop there and the store is not making all the money it could. At that point they can evaluate the cost/benefit of making the site fully accessible. For tiny stores, it's gonna cost a lot and not gain them any benefit, so I'd expect them to remain as they were, whereas the larger stores like Amazon would find it in their interests to make their site accessible.

Government provided facilities (websites, the NHS, etc) should of course maintain full accessibility, as they are responsible for all the people - and not just the ones they choose to represent (much as the MPs might like to wish otherwise) - but a private company that takes a look at the situation and decides it is not worth it to the company to make their site accessible should not have to.

Morality I'll keep short. I found a wonderful quote (or re-found, I guess, since I initially read it many years ago) from a Robert Heinlein book.

Sin lies only in hurting others unnecessarily. All other “sins” are invented nonsense.

Think about that for a moment.   For me, it rings true...

((Oh - and while looking for this one again, I found: There is no worse tyranny than to force a man to pay for what he does not want merely because you think it would be good for him.   - another Heinlein quote, and it sums up rather neatly all that I think is wrong with out current government...))

Gonna have to leave the fate of mankind for another time - have to get back to work now :-)

bigscarylunar @ 2007-02-07T09:07:00

2007-02-07T09:13:15Z

Pilfered from plib

Below are Time's most significant SF novels between 1953-2006.

The meme part of this works like so: Bold the ones you have read, strike through the ones you read and hated, italicize those you started but never finished, and put a star (*) next to the ones you love.

I have lots of reading to do...

1. The Lord of the Rings, J.R.R. Tolkien - never really liked it - way too much random stuff that had nothing to do with the story
2. The Foundation Trilogy, Isaac Asimov **
3. Dune, Frank Herbert ***
4. Stranger in a Strange Land, Robert A. Heinlein ***
5. A Wizard of Earthsea, Ursula K. Le Guin *
6. Neuromancer, William Gibson
7. Childhood's End, Arthur C. Clarke
8. Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, Philip K. Dick
9. The Mists of Avalon, Marion Zimmer Bradley
10. Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury
11. The Book of the New Sun, Gene Wolfe
12. A Canticle for Leibowitz, Walter M. Miller, Jr.
13. The Caves of Steel, Isaac Asimov * - an early work, but still a good read
14. Children of the Atom, Wilmar Shiras
15. Cities in Flight, James Blish
16. The Colour of Magic, Terry Pratchett - I wasn't overly impressed with this one. For me, the Discworld series didn't start until Mort
17. Dangerous Visions, edited by Harlan Ellison
18. Deathbird Stories, Harlan Ellison
19. The Demolished Man, Alfred Bester
20. Dhalgren, Samuel R. Delany
21. Dragonflight, Anne McCaffrey
22. Ender's Game, Orson Scott Card ***
23. The First Chronicles of Thomas Covenant the Unbeliever, Stephen R. Donaldson *
24. The Forever War, Joe Haldeman
25. Gateway, Frederik Pohl
26. Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, J.K. Rowling
~~27. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams~~ - way way way too much stupid humour, at the expense of story
28. I Am Legend, Richard Matheson
29. Interview with the Vampire, Anne Rice
30. The Left Hand of Darkness, Ursula K. Le Guin - read this years ago - can't really remember it...
31. Little, Big, John Crowley
32. Lord of Light, Roger Zelazny
33. The Man in the High Castle, Philip K. Dick
34. Mission of Gravity, Hal Clement
35. More Than Human, Theodore Sturgeon
36. The Rediscovery of Man, Cordwainer Smith
37. On the Beach, Nevil Shute
38. Rendezvous with Rama, Arthur C. Clarke
39. Ringworld, Larry Niven
40. Rogue Moon, Algis Budrys
41. The Silmarillion, J.R.R. Tolkien
42. Slaughterhouse-5, Kurt Vonnegut
43. Snow Crash, Neal Stephenson ** - some fantastic ideas in here
44. Stand on Zanzibar, John Brunner
45. The Stars My Destination, Alfred Bester
46. Starship Trooper, Robert A. Heinlein *** - fantastic book, and I have to admit I'm surprised not to see more Heinlein on this list - this one and Stranger is all...
47. Stormbringer, Michael Moorcock
48. The Sword of Shannara, Terry Brooks
49. Timescape, Gregory Benford
50. To Your Scattered Bodies Go, Philip Jose Farmer

Fight me if you dare | Combat Cards

2007-01-26T15:23:28Z

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The torchwood crew

2007-01-09T11:44:52Z

Jack - Mysterious, enigmatic... The writers clearly want us to wonder exactly what is his past, except we've all seen Dr Who, so we already know. Most of the fun of him is waiting for the others to catch on. And although he comes over all tough sometimes, he lets his compassion get in the way all the time (he should have sacked most of the crew already for instance, and made sure they forgot all they'd seen, one way or the other).

Ianto - reason he should have been sacked: Hiding a cyberwoman in the basement, then waking her up and letting her go on a (small) killing spree.
Ianto seems to have very little personality. The only time we got to see anything affecting him emotionally was when his girlfriend was about, and she was mostly cyberwoman. Other than that he stands ready to help and is completely boring.

Tosh - Reason she should have been sacked: actually, Tosh is the least bad of them all - the only dodgy thing she did was not tell them when she could read their minds.
Tosh is competent, intelligent and seems very out of place, in that she can actually do her job. I can't help but feel that they'd be a lot better off if they got rid of the rest of the team and just let Tosh handle things.

Owen - Reason he should have been sacked: Where do we begin?
From implied rape in the very first episode to opening the Rift (the thing they were told never to do, ever) in episode 12, and a whole bunch of stuff in-between, Owen has been steadily self-destructing (although the writers seem to have moved quickly away from the rape aspect - I suspect a large outcry from the fans).

Gwen - Reason she should have been sacked: Freeing Suzie for a start - although she almost died for it, she seems the sort of person who'd do it again.
Starting off as a goodie-two-shoes, Gwen had a lot of promise, as the person who could lighten the dark dingy Torchwood halls, bringing a touch of humanity to them (from the way she insisted they had to hunt down the serial killer right at the start, and not just profit from his/her kills), but after only a few episodes she was neglecting her boyfriend, dropping him completely when work called. Only a little while later she was cheating on him, and in episode 12 she goes so far as to use Retcon on him in a failed bid to redeem some small shred of her self-respect and get forgiveness/absolution from him.

If this is what stands between the human race and whatever is out there, we may as well just roll over and surrender now...

Update

2006-04-22T05:41:04Z

The story is making progress. I've finished most of a detailed synopsis, and a scene by scene guide to what happens - now I just have to write it...

Long time no see

2006-04-21T00:17:54Z

I'm gonna try to get in the habit of posting here again - can anyone recommend a decent GUI tool? I'll forget if I have to come to this website all the time... I used to use one that had an icon in the shape of a pencil, green as I recall.

Anyway - things are not too bad here. I'm working from home at the moment, mainly on websites and the like. Not actually making enough to support myself so my savings are eroding, but slowly, and I'm enjoying my time off. I may have to find more work in a couple of months, but for now all is good.

I have been putting a few things off which need to change... I promised a friend I'd write a story to go in a compilation he was putting together ages ago and have been getting a very good idea of what people mean when they say writer's block. Most of the problem is procrastination though, so I'm determined. Tomorrow I'm gonna sit down for a good few hours and get my first draft progressed. I'm not sure I can finish it in one day, but I can try, and I'll send whatever I do have at the end of the day to him, along with an apology for it's tardiness.

I've also agreed to have a Vampire game ready to run for the next BWoG. Because we're all busy next month, the next BWoG is probably going to be in June, but that's still not far away, so I need to start prep now...

Additionally, a few of my sites need a complete redesign, and a few need updating - it could take me a while, so I've been putting it off. Well that ends here... Tomorrow I write a story, next week I take over the world! Or something like that...

Hair ribbons?!!!

2004-07-31T18:50:29Z

Generate your Anime Style by Jena-su
Name:
Hair:	Rediculously long, always flowing.
Clothes:	Little by way of actual clothes, but lots and LOTS of really cool accessories.
Powers:	Healing
Special Features:	Cat ears and tail
Sidekick:	The great spirit of (insert character name of choice here), as channeled through whatever item you have onhand at the time.
Attitude:	Overprotective of those you care about.
Weapon:	Slingshot

Quiz created with MemeGen!

Insomnia sucks

2004-07-19T02:12:19Z

The title says it all really. I have to be up and ready for work in 5 hours, and have been trying to get to sleep since about midnight. I lay in bed for two and a half hours before giving up and deciding to try and do something constructive. If course, with my brain in it's current state, constructive is a relative term, and I spent the last 20 minutes writing a piece of javascript that will tell me how many days I have been going out with Shevy.

The main problem I have with insomnia is that it's boring and painful. When all I am doing is lying there, I can't help but think of all the things that can go wrong with my life and all the things that have already gone wrong: Why am I working for a pittance? Why did I never get a degree? Will the relationship with Shevy really work? Am I destined to be a sad, lonely person for the rest of my life? Something about the night denies all possibility of cheerful thoughts.

It's not normally a problem. When I'm curled up in bed with Shevy I don't think bad thoughts, and sleep is not normally long in coming, but I've been snoring recently and Shevy wakes at the slightest sound. She's been getting really wound up over her work and studying so decided she'd get a better night's sleep on the sofa in the living room tonight, so I get Insomnia :-(

I have no idea why I'm writing this now - I'd be much better off trying to get to sleep. Work will be a nightmare tomorrow anyway, as I've just had a week off. The last thing I need is to be half asleep because I was on the computer all night, but still - tired is better than depressed...

I just want to get some sleep...

BWOG

2004-07-05T13:47:37Z

Back at work after another Big Weekend Of Gaming. The weekend was very fun, and we got a fair bit of role-playing done (and there was quite a lot of computer game playing too, but never mind... Rainbow 6 3 Ravenshield is a very fun game - just would have been nice to have more computers). Without further ado here are my thoughts, comments and random spoutings on the games:

In the current series of mage games (run by dark_dragon_uk), there will be one game focusing on each of the players, and this game was mainly focused on plib. People all around london have been falling prey to this strange illness, which cannot be cured (or identified) by mundane medicine. Out of concern for her friends, Naomi (plib) decided to infect herself, in the hope that she could use her magic to generate some sort of antidote from within (she mentioned antibodies, which meant nothing at all to my character). She managed to infect herself and cure herself, but then caught it again, so the antibodies didn't do the job. On the plus side, she was able to work out where the illness was coming from and we're going to be on our way to fix it next game.

The only negative thing about the game was one of the NPCs. When a PC has made a character designed to be really good at soemthing (and unable to do much else) it can be very annoying for that player when a random NPC is better than them at it, for no apparent reason. If it's a bad guy and he uses his abilities to oppose the characters then it's fair enough, but in this case it was a random young friend of Naomi's who was better at hacking than a VA PC. Understandably, the PC was not that happy. Perhaps we'll find that his skills are vital at some later date, but in a way that just cheapens the PC who is great with PCs. If we need someone good with computers, we shoudl use the PC focused on that before we go to any NPC...

Exalted (run by plib)was fun as always. We finally got around to defining my Solar characters level 5 artifact using Savant and Sorcerer (ish - some of the S&S rules make little sense, so they were ignored or golden ruled. At some point I'll put details on the Wiki). We didn't have that long to play, so we didn't get that much done but we did all get to laugh at Silas falling into a sewer and being very smelly. His attempt to use stealth while driving a train was also quite amusing (although surprisingly effective). My character was fantastic as always, using his technical Expertise to free more of the Dragon kings (we have 10 or 12 free now) and Leong was very impressed and calling me his apprentice, which has to be good (as I want him to teach me some sorcery). We also found these odd people at the bottom of the city. When we followed them we found that they worshipped some sort of evil god things (no idea what they were, but they were definitely evil). That was where we stopped, but I think next game will start with a big scary fight, which is often a good thing :-)

And of course saving the best 'til last (no offense to the other games, but I've really been looking forward to Demon, and it lived up to my expectations). I thought I'd probably be in trouble when I was told that our ST (dpjrugby) was using information from my background to set up some of the first episode, and my fears were well founded. I had received a mysterious message from a demon named Ahrimal saying that I should go to Hong Kong to find out why I had fallen and learn more of my purpose. Of course, my character being the trusting sort that he is, he went. He was met in passport control by a strange man who told him to be on top of Victoria Peak at midnight, and so made his way there. When he got there, he met and recognised Ambriel (plib) and Aristarchus (dark_dragon_uk) and saw another person who he did not recognise. Any idea of talking to these odd people was scuppered by a lot of approaching cultists (causing everyone to try and hide) but they saw me and said something about us being evil and servants of the devil. I tried to talk them into being peaceful and happy, but they were having none of it. It was only when another person (who I had failed to spot) started shooting at them from the darkness that they started to listen (as I recall, Ambriel helped as well). They agreed to leave things for now but that we could resume our discussion at 3 pm the next day in a coffee house.

Ambriel, Aristarchus and I were left standing around and I was rather disturbed when Aristarchus pulled his gun on me and demanded to know my name. Unsatisfied with Azariah, he continued to threaten me. I debated assuming apocalyptic form and flying away, but thought better of it, so demanded concessions and promises from him in return for the name. He has since apologised for the threats but I am not 100% sure he can be trusted. Ambriel seems to seek the same sorts of things that I do however, so she is more trustworthy.

Aristarchus told us he was here to meet with a demonic friend of his called Nathaniel who had been building something and now it neared completion. He was to meet with him at midday the next day to see it, and wanted us to go along. Ambriel told us of missing people and asked if we would like to help her find them. The shooter and the other one came out of the bushes and we said hello and made introductions (of mortal names, at least). The shooter was called Eddie Chan and the other one was called John Ridley. It was about this time that I decided to try to contact Ahrimal and see if he was ready to meet me yet. All I got as a response was "help"

As the site of one of the abductions was nearby, Ambriel and the Eddie decided to check that out quickly while Aristarchus, John and I went to help Ahrimal. Aristarchus used one of his lores to find the quickest route, which involved Aristarchus and I using our apocalyptic form to fly down a cliff and carrying John between us. We got to the warehouse and went inside to see Ahrimal bound and stuck inside a magic circle of some kind while more cultists attempted to banish him. I tried to fly inside the circle to free him, but could not. Aristarchus had more luck breaking the circle using a nearby crane, and I was able to get Ahrimal out. He was dying, but said we had to get Nathaniel's device, as the fate of the world rested on it. He also said he'd see me in six months in LA, and then died.

We went to a nearby coffee shop (where I had espresso with the brown sprinkly bits) and saw a thing on the news saying there was some sort of earthquake and disturbance in LA. The TV pictures showed what looked to be Lucifer above the city. I tried to get in touch with my friends (and thrall) there, but with no luck. I contacted another of my thralls and asked them to try to find out what's happened.

We all decided to meet up at half past 11 the next morning, near Nathaniel's. As I had nowhere to sleep I went to look for a friendly church. I found a nice place and was just settling down to sleep when the Vicar came in and said there was no need to be uncomfortable and arranged a nice place for me to sleep in the vestry. I got talking to him about the church and the state of the world in general, and we agreed on many things. I convinced him that mankind could yet be redeemed, and that God had not abandoned us, but we had abandoned him. In an effort to prove to him the goodness in the world, I asked him to take me to the most ill member of his congregation. There was a woman with fairly advanced lung cancer. The hospitals and doctors had given up on her, but with the grace of God I was able to heal her, and I showed the good Father how.

The next morning I was on my way to the local hospice when a big black car pulled up alongside and some menacing looking fellows asked me to get in. I was taken to meet with Justin Vaughan. It was about now that I had my great idea. I believe that humanity can be redeemed. All of them. No exceptions. So I decided I would attempt to redeem Justin Vaughan. It would not be easy, and may take a lot of time, but if I could prove that even the lowest of the low can see God's grace, then I can truly start to heal the world.

Vaughan learned of a shipment from one of Ryan Hemming's contacts of lots of drugs. As I used to work for Hemmings he tasked me with retrieving it, and said that all bad blood would be forgotten if I did. Moreover he said that if I could procure Hemmings as well as the shipment then I could find myself in a very nice place within his organisation as he has need of reliable people and wants to assist up-and-coming talent. He had captured one of Hemmings' men (called Gregory), who he agreed to turn over to me, as he could get no more information from him. He also gave me a Mercedes.

I drove with Gregory in the mercedesn to a deserted spot in the country and got him out of the car. I took him away and asked him why he was protecting Hemmings. I tried to reassure him that I wanted to help him, and not hurt him. He told me that Hemmings had arranged for his daughter to attend a private school in LA and that as Vaughan killed Hemmings' daughter, he feared for his daughter's life if he told anyone where to find Hemmings. I told him of the disturbance in LA and promised him I would do all I could to help find and protect his daughter.

I reasoned that pushing for information on Hemmings would only drive him away from me and make him not trust me, so I thought I would show him some of my powers in a subtle way. I asked him to walk with me around a hospice and I asked the people there if they would like to be blessed. All those who said yes I healed, but subtly. I met the good father from the church I slept in at the hospice and asked him if he could look after Gregory for me as there may be unpleasant people looking for him, and then I left to go to the arranged meeting with the other Fallen.

On the way I was stopped by the police, who had obviously been listening to what was said in Vaughan's apartment. They told me I had to wait as they needed to consult a visiting Inspector from LA, and I was surprised when Eddie Chan walked in. I pretended no to know him, and we arranged that I'd turn in Vaughan and Hemmings and I would be released without charge. This got me out immediately, and gave me time to work on redeeming Vaughan, if not a lot of time.

By the time I made it to the meeting point, the whole thing was over. Ambriel, Aristarchus and John told me that a Demon had shown up and destroyed Nathaniel completely, then taken the item we were supposed to get. Small consolation that I could have made no difference even if I had been there. We debated what to do about this and headed for the meeting with the cultists from the previous night.

When we got there, we were magically assaulted and then three men with machine guns came in and opened fire. I was seriously wounded, and John and Aristarchus assumed apocalyptic form. Aristarchus killed one of the attackers and ripped energy from his departing spirit while John scared off the other two. We left, quickly.

On the plus side, i think I'm remembering more about my lores, and how to heal people. I'll test it on Gregory when I get back to him...

it was my birthday yesterday :-)

2004-06-14T14:20:35Z

Had a nice quiet day... it was nice not to have to do anything, but I really could have done with not having hayfever... My parents were over on Saturday so Shevy and I made some Chicken and ham pies - only just made enough for the meal and one for them to take home. I have tried making more in the past (to use as lunches) but they all get eaten by our housemates, and they are too much effort to make for other people to eat.

Am going to try and get the week of Shevy's birthday off - I could do with a break and that's only a few weeks away, and we can spend some time together without other people always being there...

Interesting:

2004-06-14T08:29:22Z

How to make a bigscarylunar

Ingredients:

5 parts friendliness

3 parts self-sufficiency

3 parts energy

Method:
Combine in a tall glass half filled with crushed ice. Add a little lovability if desired!

Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

and yet more

2004-06-01T16:15:36Z

B	Bold
I	Intense
G	Glamorous
S	Shiny
C	Courageous
A	Astonishing
R	Relaxing
Y	Young
L	Luscious
U	Unusual
N	Neglected
A	Amorous
R	Responsible

Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com

Quizzes ahoy!

2004-06-01T16:15:04Z

Angel Style by greymentality

Name/Username

First Impression from Others

Ready to follow you into battle, if you want...

Your Core

Is warm and beaming with soft light

Potential to Stray from the Light: 82%

Your Weakness

Lovely mortals in torment. ANY torment.

Your Strength

You are the Bard of the Angels.

Your Wings

Shiney metal wings that flow like feathers

Your Focus

Worship

Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!

Cool thingy

2004-06-01T16:13:47Z

/me is l33t - so there :-)

2004-05-28T14:21:41Z

Magister Mundi sum!
"I am the Master of the Universe!"
You are full of yourself, but you're so cool you
probably deserve to be. Rock on.

Which Weird Latin Phrase Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Your Vampire: The Masquerade Character
Name/Username
Gender
Clan	Brujah
Sect	Sabbat
Generation	5
Why did your sire Embrace you?	They fell in love with you.
What does the local prince think of you?	They don't bother with you.
Discipline you're likely to master in the future	Serpentis

This Quiz by Shahrizai - Taken 3041 Times. </a>